was i right, once upon a time, when i thought it would be cruel to thrust a child into this life i seem to hate so often? maybe they should have a test to verify that one is ready to have a child, and then 2, and so on. maybe they do. i guess it wouldnt turn out too cruel if the child ends up dealing with it all quite well. it's been a while since i first heard terence mckenna utter the phrase "culture is not your friend". but it's been seeping in slowly. its hard to practice thinking and verifying for myself while immersed in it all. but my mind and body are my own. "dont knock it until you try it" is redneck wisdom. i'm gonna have a fucking headache tomorrow morning again. i should substitute alcohol with pot completely.